I’ve only gone and sold a load of bloody books!!!

I woke up this morning on my day off and very slowly opened up my emails etc… to see what was going on. I then opened my KDP Amazon site to see if I’d sold any books.

I’d actually sold six. SIX BLOODY BOOKS IN THE MORNING!!!!! Long may this continue! Thank you whoever you are and I hope you all like them.


So I just thought I’d share with the world how chuffed I am. Have a good day!!!

Feel free to check out my reviews on my Amazon pages if you are a reader:

My Amazon.com page: https://www.amazon.com/Lewis-J.F.-Clarke/e/B00MCKBZFK/ref=sr_ntt_srch_lnk_1?qid=1511525971&sr=8-1

The Amazon.co.uk page (Where most of my reviews are): https://www.amazon.co.uk/Lewis-J.F.-Clarke/e/B00MCKBZFK/ref=sr_ntt_srch_lnk_1?qid=1511525959&sr=8-1

Paid Marketing? In The Words Of Brock Lesnar; “You’re here….I’m here….Let’s…do…THIS??????”

Oh shit!!! It’s all well and good saying that you are going to do these things to sound good in front of people and make it sound like you have your shit together; but it’s another thing to actually go through with it and actually invest some of your hard earned money and essentially gamble it, in the hope that your product will boom as a result.

Here’s the parody video that uses a clip from the film ‘Anchorman’…

…But here we go! Tomorrow I will discuss a strategy (Whatever that means. Sounds good though…) with the guy who is going to help me pump these books out to people and reach a brand new audience. We have two steps to take so far to dip my feet in the water, then go from there. They are:

1) Facebook/Twitter ads

I’m not sure how this is going to work, but he does so I guess that’s all that matters. I need to spend tonight thinking about who my ‘target audience’ is, and from there push it to the moon. Apparently there are many types of Facebook ads and if I tried to invest money in this myself it would most likely be like me placing my savings into the bank of South Park…

…so now I’ve found someone who understands how this marketing game works. And more importantly, someone I can trust, it’s time for me to get these ads up and running.

2) Business cards

The guy who is helping me with this told me that cards are not necessary for me, as I am not offering a service. However I still feel it could be a good investment. Mainly because they are so cheap to make in Thailand. For me it is more of a case of getting my name out there without having to painfully tell people how great I am. So having a few hundred business cards that I can give to people or even leave in the tourist restaurants for people to find could end up with a few extra sales, which can snowball judging by my recent reviews…

Also there have been a few times where I have been speaking to people and I’ve had to stop the conversation and show them my books on Amazon. I cringe inside because it feels like a sales pitch. Whereas casually slipping someone a card may not feel as bad, because they can easily throw it away if they want. And if they don’t and happen to stumble across my card a few months later it could end up leading to another curious sale…


I get it; books aren’t an easy sale, but selling isn’t my job; my job – and passion – is to write. So I’ll stick to what I do best and I’m more than happy to pay someone who has a natural marketing talent to advertise my books to the right people, the right websites and the right forums. I’ve got a product that everyone will like, now it is down to cracking the code and getting enough people aware of these books and taking a chance on them until they skyrocket and start pinging around everyone’s social media accounts…


Feel free to check out my reviews on my Amazon pages if you are a reader:

My Amazon.com page: https://www.amazon.com/Lewis-J.F.-Clarke/e/B00MCKBZFK/ref=sr_ntt_srch_lnk_1?qid=1511525971&sr=8-1

The Amazon.co.uk page (Where most of my reviews are): https://www.amazon.co.uk/Lewis-J.F.-Clarke/e/B00MCKBZFK/ref=sr_ntt_srch_lnk_1?qid=1511525959&sr=8-1

Views from 100 countries! Is your country on the list…?

Yesterday I got a view on my blog from Libya. This officially means that I have had people from 100 separate countries view my blog. I would like to say thank you to all of you! I don’t expect you all to sieve through all the countries that have viewed my blog but here are the countries that have viewed my blog so far:

North and Central America






The Dominican Republic

Trinidad and Tobago


South America













Bosnia and Herzgovina



























The Czech Republic

The European Union (I wonder what random obscure place this was…)

The Netherlands

The Republic of Ireland

The United Kingdom













South Africa











Hong Kong









Myanmar (Burma)





Saudi Arabia


South Korea

Sri Lanka



The Maldives

The Philippines

The United Arab Emirates (UAE)




New Zealand



Again, thank you to all of you who have taken an interest in my blog, ans an even bigger thank you to those of you who have gone one step further and taken an interest in my books. I’m looking forward to posting another blog like this when I get to 150 countries 🙂



Amazon link for the UK (and where most of my reviews are): https://www.amazon.co.uk/Lewis-J.F.-Clarke/e/B00MCKBZFK/ref=sr_ntt_srch_lnk_1?qid=1511420117&sr=8-1


Amazon link for the rest of the world: https://www.amazon.com/Lewis-J.F.-Clarke/e/B00MCKBZFK/ref=sr_ntt_srch_lnk_1?qid=1511420117&sr=8-1


Birthday Celebration At Work!


It’s my birthday this weekend, and I got surprised at work by a former student who made me a cake.


All the girls that I work with arranged it as a surprise. It was really nice of them and I definitely wasn’t expecting it!


The cake was a blueberry and oreo cheesecake, and it was the bomb diggity! The girls put some candles for me to blow out, only for me to find out that they were those candles that relight themselves…


I’ve got the weekend off now so I’m going to have some Lewis time and enjoy myself here in Thailand. Thanks for reading!!!




16 Possible Surprise Entrants For The 2018 Royal Rumble

The Royal Rumble is so much fun to watch every year. On top of it being a really gripping match with lots of twists, they normally a few surprise and/or joke entrances into the rumble to keep it entertaining and in some cases light hearted. Hopefully this year will be no exception.

There are a few people who could be on this list mainly for nostalgia but realistically it won’t be happening this year due to tensions within the company or how well they are doing at other companies (Johnny Nitro, Cody Rhodes, Damien Sandow, CM Punk, Jeff Jarrett and Alberto Del Rio come to mind) however here is a list of people who I feel could be surprise entrances this year at the rumble:

Becky Lynch

Think about it; it seems like a strange pick at first but this could be a stroke of genius. The fans LOVE Becky, she can wrestle and she is naturally gorgeous. She could easily be the poster girl for the company, a company looking to show that they don’t play any favours when it comes to gender. Having Paige enter could be a great comeback if she finally returned for the rumble, but if Becky came through the curtains, maybe eliminated a lower card wrestler or two (Straight away, Curt Hawkins as it’s part of his gimmick) then gets unluckily eliminated by a heel, this would satisfy the hordes of people who think Becky should be used better. Women have entered the rumble before, so it’s not that farfetched really if you think about it.

Razor Ramon

There have been some outstanding Royal Rumble returns over the years, but the one that has really been missing is Scott Hall in his Razor Ramon persona. This is mainly because of his real life issues fighting his demons. However thanks to DDP he is reportedly healthy again, and for him to go full on Razor Ramon mode would be confusing to the younger viewers, but incredible for the ones that remember him at his best.

David Otunga

Ha ha! What??? Does this guy still wrestle? Well, no. but he is still with the company. He also has an incredible physique so could pass for a wrestler making his ‘comeback’. If he works there then from a business perspective this makes sense as an easy surprise entrant, especially as not only have people forgotten he used to wrestle, but he doesn’t have concussion issues like a lot of the wrestler turned commentators…


The rumours around Ricochet going to WWE have been around seemingly forever. I’ve said it before but the rumble could be the perfect place for him to get a pop if he comes in and does one of his double rotation moonsaults. He’s not doing anything big at the moment, so maybe this year could be his year.

Kota Ibushi

I admittedly know very little about Japanese wrestling, but this guy has a huge reputation. I’ve seen a few Youtube videos of him and know that this guy is legit, my only concern would be that the casual viewer wouldn’t know who he is and he may not get the pop he deserves. He was in the Cruiserweight Classic last year so they could promote him as that, but realistically this one is a long shot as a surprise rumble entrant.

Austin Aries

Wait… Didn’t WWE fire him a few months ago? Yes, but they’ve also fired and rehired wrestlers before, wrestlers like Daniel Bryan and Matt Hardy. Both of those wrestlers came back with huge reactions as well. Austin hasn’t burned his bridges with WWE and speaks well of them so a repackaged ‘Double A’ may not be off the cards. Another factor is that his girlfriend is currently working for WWE (Thea Trinidad) so this surprise entry is far more plausible than most of the people on this list

Lio Rush

Almost a cert until he posted those tweets a few weeks ago about Emma, now he may have damaged his chances of progressing through this company. The guy is only 5’6 anyway so he was already at a disadvantage, but when I saw how quick he was in an NXT match all I could think was ‘surprise entrant’. Again, highly unlikely now considering how many people he’s pissed off…or from a business perspective, likely because people are now talking about him. You decide…

Kassius Ohno

OHHH NO! OH NO! Chris Hero dominates the indies, but he seems to disappear whenever the WWE writing staff get a hold of him. The guy’s got talent so give him a push. Put him in the rumble and see if he floats…


One of the most underrated wrestlers of the Attitude Era (along with Dean Malenko) would be an unexpected arrival and people would go nuts. Admittedly they would go crazier for the 2010 winner Edge, but he has neck issues, the same neck issues that stop Stone Cold cleaning house at the rumble every year. Christian could be a great talking point for the rumble for the long term fans.


Kenny Omega

I know the name, but again I know very little about Japanese wrestling. He has a reputation though, and the rumours were hot about him entering last year. Maybe this year is when I get to see what all the fuss is about…

John Cena

May be a redundant pick as there is talk of him returning at Survivor Series, but he is a storyline free agent and he’s got to come back sometime…

Jeff Hardy

Gets an IC title opportunity then gets injured. Same as John; he’s got to come back sometime. People love Jeff, and he’s always welcomed at the rumble, so as long as he heals up in time this one not only could be a possibility, but by the time the rumble comes around he could just be a normal entrant and not a surprise one.


Same as Jeff, the WWE fans love him. As I said last year he is getting on a bit now, so a short term deal could benefit both parties. Those educated feet could be put to good use in one more rumble.


But doesn’t he have a contract dispute? Or is it part of an angle to trick the fans into forgetting he exists, then he gets that upper-mid card push to see if he can hang with the main eventers? Most likely it’s the former, but it would be quality if it is all an elaborate ruse just to hear the pop when he enters at number two or number three…

Hideo Itami

Poor old Hideo… billed as the top Japanese star but injuries have slowed his momentum down while other Japanese stars like Asuka and Nakamura have thrived. He’s not lighting up NXT right not either. Let him loose on the rumble like they did with Rusev and Braun Strowman and see if he survives. Granted he’s not a big man like these two, but a few surprise eliminations would make the casuals sit up and take notice.

Scott Steiner

Many people don’t realise how much Scott was an innovator for wrestling. He got a throat injury in the ring a few years ago that nearly killed him so now he’s retired and runs a successful restaurant. He doesn’t need to return, but the pull of walking out in an arena full of people one more time may be too much for him to resist. A good compromise for both parties could be one more royal rumble appearance, possibly even a face to face with Brock Lesnar (Two suplex kings) could be an amazing talking point for this year’s rumble.


Loi Krathong 2017: Chiang Mai, Thailand

I’m back in Chiang Mai! And that means I’m experiencing all the Thai holidays again. So it didn’t take long until the first major holiday came along: Loi Krathong.


Loi Krathong is essentially a lantern festival. The Thai people believe that when they light the ‘krathong’ – or lantern – and let it go that they are releasing their stresses and fears into the air and simply ‘letting go’, which is a great idea. I’m not 100% sure about the history of the holiday, but this is how the Thai’s view it.

I have a few friends in Chiang Mai from various countries, so I thought it would be a good idea for us all to go out together so they can have more friends in the area. Two out of the three had never been to a proper Thai buffet before, so I took them there first to experience the cuisine and get to know each other, then once we had demolished the buffet it would be time to head off to see the lanterns.


The Thai buffet is known as a ‘moo grata’ (literal translation: Grilled pork) and you basically have a small BBQ in front of you where you can cook your raw meats, then you have a sort of ‘soup’ around the BBQ which you can place vegetables or quails eggs in. Then you can add noodles and various spicy sauces which really gives the food a kick. It’s a must-do for anyone travelling to Thailand.

Not the actual buffet, but this is a ‘moo grata’ I had a few years ago with some friends of mine

Once we were full we grabbed a Grab (Asian Uber) and headed towards the bridge. The views were spectacular, however sometimes the camera didn’t do it justice because it is so dark and the lanterns are comparatively far away. I got some good shots though…

When we got to the second bridge which contained slightly drunker people we had to avoid the krathongs. Mainly because to get the krathongs to fly you light them, then wait for them to be heated before releasing them. However most people let them go as soon as the krathongs stood up by themselves and they went up a few metres before coming back down again…


Most of the time it wasn’t a problem because the wind had already blew them off the bridge, but one in particular that flew past me then landed on this girl’s head. I rushed to the girl and lifted it off of her before her hair caught fire or something worse happened. You can never be too careful…


We ended the evening by going to a bar and getting McShitfaced. I played a few games of pool with my friend David and the ball literally went backwards twice! The first time the ball hit a pebble that was on the table and rolled back perfectly for David to pot. The second time was there was a groove on the table where the ball hit, and rolled back gently so I could hit it, but not pot it. I had to do a Jimmy White ‘masse’ shot in the end…

And that was my Loi Krathong! The view from my apartment was the best of all and away from the massive crowds. However the photos weren’t as good as seeing it live though. Which goes to show that sometimes it’s best to put the phone down and experience those feeling of awe just by looking at something, otherwise you may miss the beauty in front of you that a photo cannot capture…


It’s hard to tell, but all of those fuzzy dots in the air are the lanterns from a distance, which didn’t come out well on camera…



Link to my books on amazon.com:




Tonight I went to grab some dinner and after I finished eating I felt more confident and happy than I’ve ever felt in my life. At first I wondered if this was the ‘moment’ that Keni and Jamie told me about when I would feel better than I have ever felt, but I soon realised it was because this vegan month was finally over. I felt so happy! I was literally singing ‘Yah mo b there’ as loud as I could as I was cycling home.


This month has been eye-opening, and not for the reasons I was expecting it to be. I’ve had some good meals, and I’ve had some dodgy meals too, but I’m really looking forward to eating some meals that I genuinely enjoy again. I just hope I don’t gorge on meat so much that it renders all that I’ve done this month completely pointless…

OK, vegan story! Tonight I ordered some mushroomy dish. To be honest it looked like dog food, but I thought I’d take a picture of my very last meal for this month. I then remembered that I’d turned my phone off to save the battery, so as I turned it on I thought to myself that surely the meal can’t be as bad as it looked…

Good news

It didn’t, it actually tasted amazing.

Bad news

It was also blow your blooming brains out spicy.

So much so that the owners came over and asked if i was OK. I smiled and said I should be fine.

“Are you sure? Because your face has changed colour…” Was the concerning reply.

I said that I could simply brush off the chillis and then eat it. I took one bite of ‘chilli-less’ mushrooms and they said “No, no way.” before taking the meal away from me. They immediately said ‘no charge’ and gave me something else to choose. God knows what I must have looked like! Maybe I nearly died…

With my sudoku because I’m trying to pretend I’m intelligent…

The other meal was just as good, and nowhere near as spicy. I loved the fact that they were concerned and without hesitation got another meal for me. Regardless of how this month has gone for me I have found some great restaurants and met some great people (the cyclists I met early on in this month were a prime example that there are plenty of normal non-angry vegans out there!) but this isn’t me. I like burgers and cheese, not imitations. I will eat vegan food every so often which in a way will cut down on meat intake, but this lifestyle full-time is definitely not for me…

That being said, I FUCKING DID IT BABY!!!! There were a hell of a lot of times when I wanted to give up. I spoke to a few people who said they tried it and only lasted a few days which didn’t bode well for me. But somehow I did it. Now I’m off to grab a ham and cheese sarnie from 7/11. I think it’s time to hear the ‘outstanding’ soundbyte from Mortal Kombat…

Overall Cost

I want to keep tally (for me as well as you) about what I’ve bought over the month and how much it cost. To give you an idea I round up 50 baht to the Pound. If you are dealing with Dollars it is around 35, but round it down to 30 to make it easier to tally up…


Day 31:

Mixed veg fried rice – 35 Baht
Stir fried vegetables and brown rice – 40 Baht

Today’s Total: 75 Baht

Overall Total: 4895 Baht

4895 Baht for the entire month??? That’s around £100! I was expecting this month to be a HELL of a lot more expensive! Just goes to show there are reasonably priced vegan options out there if you look for them. Well, in Chiang Mai anyway, I can’t vouch for the rest of the world…

“This book is a great read, especially if your are looking for a story that you are able to finish easily in a single day. Clarke takes you on journey as you see how someone is coping with a new identity after committing a crime. While the beginning of the story starts off a bit slow once you get past the first few pages it picks up and you are taken in the mind of Chris while experiencing a few twists and turns along the way. One wish I had for the book is the character development and story between Chris and Keira. I felt that it was a bit rushed and this relationship is important for Chris’s character. Overall, I thought the book was a great read, easy to get through and you could easily finish it within a day!” Kets


Vegan Month: Day 30, Nearly done…LIKE A BOSS!!!

I did not shit on Debra’s desk though…

Cost So Far

I want to keep tally (for me as well as you) about what I’ve bought over the month and how much it cost. To give you an idea I round up 50 baht to the Pound. If you are dealing with Dollars it is around 35, but round it down to 30 to make it easier to tally up…

Day 29:

Big old vegan meal at the university – 35 Baht
Massaman curry and brown rice – 65 Baht

Today’s Total: 100 Baht

Overall Total: 4820 Baht

(I’m actually on course to finish this month spending less than 5000 baht (£100) which is incredible!!!)

“I really enjoyed this book and didn’t want it to end. I think it brings a valid message and without giving too much away, proves that alcohol is an unnecessary prop when you have faith in your Destiny.” Thelma McNelly


Vegan Month!: Day 29, Autopilot

I was speaking to a mate of mine today, and he pointed out that on the 1st of November I should ease my way back into eating meat cheese, eggs, etc… because my body has gotten used to not having meat in its system for so long, which means I could get really sick.

I’ve been joking to people that at 11:59 on Tuesday I’m going to be standing outside McDonalds ready to eat so many burgers that it would render this entire month pointless. There was an element of truth to that, the more I count down the days until the 1st the more excited I get that I can eat a lot of my favourite foods again. I’m still depressed to the extent that I don’t want to interact with anyone, get up and do something (even something I enjoy, like play the Playstation) or even write documenting my journey (I’m sure a lot of you have noticed I’ve been half-arsing this recently. I used to put so much effort into my posts.) I just hope that after this month ends, the feelings of depression and negativity don’t continue to linger…

So anyway, let’s get on with the vegan stuff. Very quickly, the noodles were great, however I poured chilli sauce on the potatoes instead of ketchup (I’m colourblind…) So I got slightly spicy potatoes instead



Cost So Far

I want to keep tally (for me as well as you) about what I’ve bought over the month and how much it cost. To give you an idea I round up 50 baht to the Pound. If you are dealing with Dollars it is around 35, but round it down to 30 to make it easier to tally up…

Day 29:

Veggies and rice – 30 Baht
Glass noodles with veggies – 60 Baht
Steamed Potatoes – 90 Baht

Today’s Total: 180 Baht

Overall Total: 4720 Baht



Vegan Month: Day 28, Nearly there…

No need for a long old blog post. On Wednesday (Or Tuesday at 12 if you want to get technical…) I get to eat meat again. This vegan month has opened up my eyes in positive and negative ways, but this reaction tells me everything I need to know; I’m a far more positive and happy person when I’m allowed to eat what I like.

I will eat at vegan restaurants once in a blue moon, but yeah, definitely looking forward to eating meat again. Tonight one of my mates was eating chicken wings at the bar, and it was fucking brutal knowing that not only could I not have one, but I couldn’t eat 99% of the food on offer there.

Cost So Far

I want to keep tally (for me as well as you) about what I’ve bought over the month and how much it cost. To give you an idea I round up 50 baht to the Pound. If you are dealing with Dollars it is around 35, but round it down to 30 to make it easier to tally up…

Day 28:

Veggies and rice – 30 Baht
Chips and onion rings at the bar-de-bar bar… – 160 Baht

Today’s Total: 190 Baht

Overall Total: 4540 Baht