Plovdiv part 3: That Was A Bit Messy!

  • Note: stories have been played down to avoid legal repercussions…

To recap: I’d just finished writing my eighth book and planned on celebrating with anyone who made eye contact. Day 1 involved a drinking game with the seemingly immune to alcohol Ellie and some German bloke. The German bloke had gone but others had soon arrived to the party…

Michael was still there, but was not acting how he did when I first met him and had basically proved that his first impression was a defence mechanism and was actually quite a nice person. We also had a Belgian legend by the name of Manu, the dangerous couple consisting of Ingrid and Greg, the lovely but somewhat underappreciated Ellie, Matilde the French girl, Will the Colchester chap and Jeremie as a member of the supporting cast (All names must be said in an aggressive French accent)

Well that was the second night, with me getting very drunk again, playing the same drinking game with more people until I confessed a lot of sexual things that I wasn’t expecting to share with them for at least two more days… Then there was a new challenger entering the arena. An Australian guy by the name of Aaron, who hilariously was the guy I met in Sofia who was acting like a side mission on Spyro The Dragon.

I said to him that I thought I’d met him in Sofia.

“Nah mate, I don’t think you did.” He said in his distinct Aussie accent.

“Weren’t you the bloke who was taking the photo outside the opera house and I asked you for directions?” I asked him.

“Fuck me mate! You’re right!” He said joyfully, and then shook my hand.

That was pretty much it for me that night. It was my birthday that day, and after drinking for two days straight I needed to rest my stomach and I wasn’t feeling that great anyway. So I popped down at about 11 to be social, and Aaron was a little bit tipsy…

Michael was looking at him like a lovestruck teenager because apparently Aaron had met Bam Margera in Estonia and had ended up living with him for 8 days. He was telling us stories about what they’d got up to and Michael didn’t believe it. I did, because I knew Aaron had no reason to lie. Aaron got his camera out and did a little video diary for us to introduce ourselves and when he got to me I said that it was my birthday that day.

“NO FAKIN WAY!!!” He slurred excellently that gave me a hug to make me feel manly.

Everyone went out to the bar afterwards except me and Aaron. Aaron declared that we should do shots of whisky. My stomach was way too fragile for that so I said no.

“Nah listen…shut up…listen and…we should do shots…” Was Aaron’s reply.

“OK I’ll do one…” I replied. I did a small one with him and went to bed. He was still listening to heavy metal by the time I fell asleep, and was apparently still up drinking by the time everyone came back from the bar at 4:30

The next day my stomach was rested so we were in party mode. We started relatively early. (Not early afternoon drinking like a normal session starts, but we’d done a few touristy things around Bulgaria and headed back once it got cold). We’d all bought a bottle of vodka or whisky EACH and got ready to kill our livers. Except Aaron. Aaron was sleeping during the day as he hadn’t slept all night.

Aaron woke up just in time to join us for yet another drinking game. We played card games and generic drinking games with complicated rules. It got messy, we got messy and Manu punched me in the stomach pretending to stab me with an imaginary knife and misjudged the distance. By 1:00 I’d caught my breath and were off to take on the town and prove why native English speakers shouldn’t  be allowed to travel…

More drinks ensued. I was pissed out of my head. Ingrid and Greg didn’t come out because they wanted to do Ingridandgreg things, but the rest of us ventured out and kept drinking away. I was so drunk I was approaching world class Bulgarian girls and chatting to them full of confidence. It wasn’t the ‘I didn’t even come out; I only popped out…’ speech, but I still had a story, a story of finishing a book after writing for 8 months and the double celebration of my birthday. There was one ten out of fucking ten girl I was talking to and her boyfriend came over. I didn’t even care! I was like “YYYEAH! WELCOME TO THE PARTY!!!”And chatting to the lot of them like we were old friends. I even got facebook details off of one girl. I found out later that she was a bit too young for me and was in a relationship anyway, but if I find a job in Plovdiv she could be a cool friend to have in the future.

I was chatting to various people before leaving the bar at 5. I got a slice of pizza for 1.20 Lev (60p) and went to sleep at approximately 6 o clock.

I got woken up at 10 by Aaron and Manu who had both stayed up all night drinking, watched the sunrise from the viewpoint and decided to carry on drinking all day. I don’t know what possessed us to do it but we were now talking like pirates for the entire day. I was wearing half a coconut as a hat, Aaron had a pirate hat and Manu had an Aussie straw hat with corks hanging off it. I knew better than to carry on drinking but these guys were relentless, Manu eventually passed out at 12 whereas Aaron was still going strong and asking me if I could go to the shops and “…get him some more faking beers and ciders!”

I was on my laptop at 2:30 answering emails and a disoriented Aaron came upstairs and was counting the beds.

“Dude…I’m so fucking drunk and I’ve got no idea whats going on…” He said hilariously “There’s 4 people checking in saying they’ve booked online and there’s nothing on the system.”

So I went downstairs and between us we managed to sort things out. There was a Spanish guy and an Italian girl checking in and they had questions for us; questions that even a sober person would struggle to answer, let alone someone who had been working there for one day and had been drinking for 36 hours. They then asked Aaron what was good to do around the town during the day.

“I reckon what you should do…is go down the town and get absolutely shitfaced!!!” He slurred in a full on Australian accent. I couldn’t help but laugh and the couple swiftly left after we’d told them about the wine festival and that they should ‘get pissed for free’. Aaron then gave me some money to get some more beers and ciders, and had a can of beer in his hand from then onwards…


At 5:00 he finally passed out with his pirate hat on, one hour before his shift finished. I went to have a shower and saw him conked out so as we were all like a family by that point we all covered each other making sure that if anyone needed to check in they’d be sorted, but in the end it was fine.

*p.s. Ellie, despite drinking more than all of us, still managed to remain sober the ENTIRE time. God that girl must be an expensive date…

Between sessions there was one night I went out to get some cheap food, chocolate and possibly (most probably) more alcohol where I bumped into Matilde down the town. I walked with her on her expedition to find some food that wasn’t…as the French say…Merde.

She opened up to me about personal things and I gave her a hug. We then talked about a few more random things like my books and her music then we sat watching Michael McIntyre on her iPad. I may or may not have carried on drinking with Manu, Ellie and Aaron and listened to heavy metal after Matilde went to bed. There’s no proof, you can’t prove anything!

The day after that snow was predicted overnight. At 1:00 in the morning there was a huge snowstorm happening outside, like a full on Disney style snowstorm on the cobbled streets of Plovdiv. Aaron had never seen snow before and began to get emotional. We all went out to share this experience with him and bonded. Then we bonded by drinking some more…

So the owner of the hotel has enough recyclable bottles in the hotel after this week to make a monthly wage out of it! We’d all spent stupid amounts of money and more than likely shortened our life spans, but we’d bonded over it and I reckon I’ve made at least three friends for life.


Ellie lost her phone and was visibly depressed for a few days, so when everything got sorted and she had got her phone back her relief and genuine smile was something that will stick in my mind until I’m old and Alzheimery. She also talks fondly of Georgia, so that’s another country on my radar now. The girl is an amazing human being and I hope to bump into her again one day, as long as she doesn’t drink me under the table…

Manu has forwarded my CV to his boss in Belgium, so I could be working with him in his bar in a few months time!

Aaron has dreadlocks so long it looks like he has multiple tails sticking out when he’s wearing a jacket. Despite that he turned out to be the most approachable, genuinely decent people I’ve ever come across. He’s another bloke I hope to never lose touch with. He’ll be the kind of guy I hope to meet again and again all over the world!

Michael loves Burger King. There’s a lot more depth to him but if you are a girl and think he’s cute, buy him Burger King and he’ll love you for at least 27 days…

Will is very good at drinking games. Do not under any circumstances challenge him…

I couldn’t have celebrated my birthday/book completion with better people, so thank you everyone for being a part of it. When my liver becomes 80% functional again it’ll be time for me to head to my next destination. Wherever that may be…

2 thoughts on “Plovdiv part 3: That Was A Bit Messy!

  1. Pingback: Fifa Night In Macedonia | sirlewisofclarke

  2. Pingback: Stop 30: Karlovo, Starring Mira Hristova | sirlewisofclarke

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