Teaching isn’t all it’s cracked up to be sometimes…

These are my last two facebook posts about my weekend class, needless to say the word ‘potential’ does not feature in their vocabulary….


Today teaching yet another advanced class. The word ‘advanced’ in this country apparently means having the ability to say their own name….

Conversation between a group of students; three 18 year old girls

Me: What do you do?
Student 1: Student
Me: OK… And what do you want to do when you are older?
Student 1: Doctor
Me: Brilliant, and what about you, what do you want to be?
Student 2: I want to do a doctor
Me: …Well you can do her then….
Me: What about you, what would you like to be?
Student 3: I want to do a doctor
Me: That’s handy, you can all do each other and i’ll watch.
<more silence>

when i peg it and reach the pearly gates, Saint Peter is going to ask me about my contribution to society. What the hell am i going to say to him?

2. (The very next day)

Day 2 of my award winning class; In the first ten minutes i got them to write down as many English names as they can think of.

(after three minutes)
Student 1: Teacher, i don’t know any names
Me: OK, think about any western movies you like. Is there an American or English film you like?
Student 1: Yes
Me: ….
Student 1: ….
Me: …Does this film have a name?
Student 1: Fast and Furious
Me: Great! And who is in that film?
Student 1: Paul Walker
Me: And what is Paul Walker’s first name?
Student 1: I don’t know

I know what i’m going to say to Saint Peter when i see him now; i’m going to say i spent the majority of my life helping the pointless….

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